Insane Family Brings Dog To Fair, Lets It Run Loose All Day
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Charles Ingalls To Host Farm Reform Camp
Walnut Grove, Minn.- Citing his many successes with reforming people’s problems by making them work on his farm, Charles Ingalls has decided to host The Charles Ingalls Farm Reform Camp next summer. Registration is now open and due by May 15th, although as Ingalls notes, there is not a problem if people who wish to…
Tasting Morphine Doc Baker’s Favorite Part of Job
Walnut Grove, Minn.-Sources in Walnut Grove report that Doc Baker’s favorite part of his job seems to be taste testing morphine. A drug commonly prescribed for pain, Doc Baker regularly orders it through the Mercantile. Nels Oleson, proprietor of Oleson’s Mercantile, started becoming suspicious at the frequency of the morphine shipments arriving to his store….
Charles Ingalls Reveals Dark History Behind Lack of Decorations in the Little House
Walnut Grove, Minn.-The little house that Charles Ingalls built for his family when they arrived in Walnut Grove has long been noted for its sturdy construction but plain interior, with critics pointing to the complete lack of decoration inside the home. We recently sat down with Charles Ingalls, who revealed the dark and shocking secret…
Grange Sets Time Limit on Stirring Monologues
Chicago, Ill.-Following yet another stirring monologue by Charles Ingalls, the Grange has set time limits on the amount of time an audience member can speak. “This guy keeps coming to the Grange and turning everyone against us,” according to a Grange representative who chose to remain anonymous. “Not only is he getting everyone turned against…
Lars Hanson Schedules Retreat for Mill Employees
Walnut Grove, Minn.– Lars Hanson has scheduled a work retreat for the employees of Hanson Lumber Company. Lars, Charles Ingalls, and Isaiah Edwards will take a day off from processing orders for a day of team building activities. “You know how they say,” Lars said, “all work and no play make Charlie a dull boy,…
It’s Okay, Carrie Just Having Flashback
Walnut Grove, Minn.– Visitors to the Ingalls residence were recently caught off guard when Carrie, the third daughter of Charles and Caroline Ingalls, began to display strange behavior as the family sat around the dinner table. “Yeah, I know Carrie is usually strange, but this was different,” commented the visiting husband character, whose name…
Reverend Alden Would Like to Sing Something Else for a Change
Walnut Grove, Minn.– In a shocking recent interview, Walnut Grove’s own beloved Reverend Alden has revealed that he is sick of singing “Bringing in the Sheaves.” Alden told reporters that while he was excited to sing the hymn when he first started preaching in Walnut Grove, he quickly came to regret choosing it as the…
Walnut Grove: Barnmuda Triangle?
Walnut Grove, Minn.-Residents of the sleepy Minnesota town have revealed a theory that something mysterious and dark may have been going on for years. Adherents of the theory, which they are calling “The Barnmuda Triangle,” point out that there are too many people who are in town for a very short time, are kind of…