Colorado Springs, Co.-Recent reports indicate that Matthew Cooper’s memory is surprisingly bad.
This revelation coincided with the train’s first arrival in Colorado Springs. Matthew’s younger brother, Brian, excitedly exclaimed that the train’s engineer was John. As Brian now recalls, this is when the cracks in Matthew’s facade appeared.
“I can’t believe I even had to tell him,” Brian confirms. “I know I summarize things a lot and I like to keep people filled in, but this was a lot.”
Sources confirm that Dr. Mike performed plastic surgery on John in October, successfully completing the procedure in time for Halloween.
“November, December, January, February, March, April, and now May,” Brian counts on his fingers. “That’s seven months and he already forgot that Ma fixed John’s face. It was kind of a big deal, though. Ma had to read a book about it and everything.”
When asked if he remembered much outside of tending to his cattle and doing odd jobs now and then, Matthew replied that he “sure didn’t.”
At press time, John’s remaining psychological wounds were manifesting themselves in his insistence that he assist Brian with gifting his parents with a sex train for their wedding.
