Walnut Grove, Minn.– Recent reports from the farming community indicate that Reverend Alden proudly presided over a church service in which residents decided to blow the town up with John Carter’s dynamite. “I’ve learned one thing preaching in this town for all these years, and that’s that you just never know what these folks will…
Walnut Grove, Minn.- Newly arrived visitor, brother of the Wilders, and ne’er do well Perley Day Wilder has confirmed that after his sister, Eliza Jane, insisted he could never wear out his welcome he will, in fact, proceed to wear out his welcome. “I’ve never seen a challenge I wasn’t up to, this one included,”…
Anyone who knows me knows that I didn’t want Half Pint getting married before she was 18 years old. I really protested her attraction to Almanzo. Never mind that I let Mary get engaged when she was thirteen and she actually got married when she was sixteen. Inconsistent? Maybe, but I don’t owe you an…
Walnut Grove, Minn.– In light of the sensationalism surrounding the Oscars altercation between Will Smith and Chris Rock, Almanzo Wilder would like to remind everyone that he has punched a child not only once, but twice. “Well, sure, it’s not something I usually brag about, but I can’t believe people brush it under the rug…
Walnut Grove, Minn.- Laura Wilder’s recent attack of Brenda Sue Longworth in the streets of Walnut Grove has residents remembering past red flags that the young woman has displayed. “I remember when she first met Almanzo,” Albert Ingalls recalls, “and she carved their initials together in a heart on a tree on our way home…
